We ended up having a conversation with the girls last night which turned into the first conversation about them being born through a surrogate. I wasn't quite sure when we could expect to have this discussion. I wasn't prepared for it and I have no idea of how well we covered it.
Louise and Olivia get they have two daddies and they are different from other families. I really hate describing our family as different and have avoided saying that around the girls. We have been able to highlight diversity in different family structures so they do know we are not that far from the norm. They do understand that they don't have a "mummy" so then trying to explain that they came out of a surrogate's tummy was met with disbelief. We do have the photos (see!).
I'm not sure if the larger confusion comes from the concept of birth in general, the lack of a mother, or trying to understand surrogacy. "Babies don't come from tummies!" "She didn't eat us!" It was an amusing conversation in some regards.
I guess the major thing is that we have crossed the bridge and introduced the concept that they were born via a surrogate.
Louise and Olivia get they have two daddies and they are different from other families. I really hate describing our family as different and have avoided saying that around the girls. We have been able to highlight diversity in different family structures so they do know we are not that far from the norm. They do understand that they don't have a "mummy" so then trying to explain that they came out of a surrogate's tummy was met with disbelief. We do have the photos (see!).
I'm not sure if the larger confusion comes from the concept of birth in general, the lack of a mother, or trying to understand surrogacy. "Babies don't come from tummies!" "She didn't eat us!" It was an amusing conversation in some regards.
I guess the major thing is that we have crossed the bridge and introduced the concept that they were born via a surrogate.
I love how you write, the girls are going to enjoy reading this all one day. xo
ReplyDeleteI think, surrogate mothers are quite ignored and the process of surrogacy takes the all credit. Surrogacy is not possible with a woman participation and it is really a big decision for anyone to become a surrogate. So we all should give some respect to surrogate who bears the pain for 9 months and give birth to the child for someone else.
ReplyDeleteRegards,
Kunik Goel
Surrogacy In India